Writers are:
1. Spacey. Standing outside of a locked building in 30-degree weather, only one in 12 writers remembers that each of us has a key to get inside.
2. Self defeatists. During introductions, sentiments include, "My genre is poetry, but really, I write emails" and "I stopped keeping a journal because I realized I've consistently learned nothing since 1983."
3. Drunks. After self-defeating statements are uttered, someone mentions that we'll probably all be seeing each other at the town bar by night two. At breakfast the next morning, this is mentioned again.
4. Procrastinators. In a residency of 38 visual artists and 12 writers, the only table left once breakfast is over is a four-top of writers brainstorming ways to remember writing down ideas.
5. Defiant. During orientation, the tour guide tells us that the nearby hiking trails are muddy and pretty much off limits until about June. Another writer and I question what "off limits" means and what shoes would be appropriate if these trails were hypothetically not off limits.
6. Indiscreet shit talkers. As soon as this other writer and I walk away from orientation, we moan about forbidden hiking and plot how we will not write, but instead, head up to the mountain later. Only just before noticing the orientation guide is right beside us.
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